Happy new year to all my readers. Thank you for reading, following, sharing and commenting on posts from last year. I hope we continue in the same spirit.
New Year resolutions that don’t come to fruition
Why do we do it? On New Year’s Eve eve, my friend called me on her way to work – to keep her company and for her to complain on how cold it was, and for me to gloat on how warm my house was. Anyway, we got chatting about new year resolutions for 2017 and if, ever, we fulfilled them. We didn’t – because here she was going to job she had hoped to have stopped by end 2017, and here I was in a job I hated. Why is that? How come we are still where we were 365 days ago? The obvious reason was that we made ‘new year resolutions’ on autopilot [because it’s an innate human need]; there was no clear plan on how any resolutions would be met, just a raw desire and hope that we would be better off by end 2017, and we thought being better off meant better job. For 2018 maybe we should set achievable and easy goals like deciding to give more to charitable, stop buying junk we don’t need, or grow our own vegetables in our tiny gardens, smile more and be kind – possibilities are limitless, but as humans we tend to set high calibre goals because it’s usually the most logical thing to do, and the possibility of turning a new leaf and the need to lead a more fulfilling life resonates with almost everyone.
Eventually, we decided to make no resolutions for the year 2018. We decided not to party on New Year’s Eve and treat it like any other day; it’s on Sunday for pete’s sake. She had a better idea – why not invite the sisterhood to eat, drink and make merry while bitching about our resolutions that never saw the light of day – the husbands and children that never manifested; the gym memberships that never started; the businesses that never lifted off; the relationships that were never salvaged; the jobs that were never upgraded; the houses that were never decorated etc. We can go out dressed to the nines and celebrate the fact that we are still standing despite not fulfilling any of the resolutions that we hoped would make our lives better. We are happy, albeit slightly, because we are one year older but still one year if not several years behind our envisioned better selves. However, the most likely scenario would be the Sunday spent in pyjamas, cut out stockings on the head, loud moaning sighs of helplessness but easing when we realise actually new year’s day is a Monday and we would be off. The day that would be the first of everything, number 1, first Monday of the week, month and year.
We did not go out that Sunday night – instead we sat around my dining table with copious amounts of wine, grapes and cheese, pepper soup brewing on the stove and talked about why we failed so miserably. Our teenage children stayed in the bedrooms while we played music from the 80s and 90s, and tried to dance like we did back in the day only to appear like walking corpses suffering from severe convulsions.
The thing to remember though, even though most of us did not fulfil the resolutions we set, we did grow and change and that is progress and an achievement. Despite our tipsiness, we did come up with great ideas on how to set achievable goals – the girls’ night in ended up being like a corporate motivational conference – and it was worth it.
Things I hear message for the New Year – if you decide to make any resolutions, be clear and specific: most importantly, evaluate all aspects of your life, identity what is negative or impacts on you negatively and get rid of it; identify what’s positive and impacts on your positively – keep and cultivate it.
Happy New Year 2018